This night has opened my eyes

It is times like this that prove I am actually a time traveller from the past, like a sort of reverse Terminator, only a nice Terminator that chats to you over tea and buns instead of shooting you in the face. I do not know anything about pop musick and such, as I do not consume any media, or go to fashionable bars ekcetera. So it is possible for me to not know about quite major pop phenomena as long as they happened after about 1873.

I was wandering around Staples, the stationery pornographers, happily looking at little organising drawers and musing over which are the twelve best different types of pens, when there came on the radio a hideous cover version of “Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before”. I have heard it before, only by the Smiths, which are obviously the best band in human history, and I did want to stop it, except I could not saw through the little wires leading to the speakers.

I had to hurry home and listen to the Smiths version again just to make sure that it was still excellent. I do not think people should be allowed to do cover versions, which includes me in several of the poor quality bands that I have been in. I speak as someone who has genuinely recorded a cover of Katie Melua’s “Closest Thing To Crazy”, although thankfully I have not released it. It is safely under lock and key in a disused filing cabinet, with a sign on the door saying “Beware of the Leopard”.

So my point stands.

Another new single

I am feeling quite musickal at the moment, perhaps it is the rainy weather keeping me indoors. Anyway here is a track by the increasingly inaccurately-named Archway Guitar Quartet, which is me and Matt’s experimental jazz odyssey project. It is featuring Matt on guitars and rhythm programming, and me on classickal guitar.

Cheeky little gherkin

It is one of the most instantly recognisable buildings in Europe, but no-one knows its name.

(It is called 30 St Mary Axe.)

The Willis Building

It looks like I have a wide angle lens, but I cannot afford one, unless you send money to the address on your screens now. I do not though, it is the power of suggestion. Norman Foster’s beautiful curved fairground mirror, the Willis Building, reflects the Lloyd’s Building across Lime Street.

Ooh! A cheeky little gherkin is peeping out from there. That is where we are off to next in fact, courtesy of keithlard’s inquisitive lens.

New single

Well I once made a musickal record album called puresound, which was received with great critical acclaim by both people that listened to it, one of them was me though so it is not that convincing. It is just some loops and samples and things that I did in a sound editor, while drunk.

Here is some more if you liked that. It is made of some things I found while rooting through Ulrich Schnauss’s bins, but he saw me out of the window and told me to clear off. In German obviously.

Minster Court

This is Minster Court which is an amazing bizarre pastiche-Gothic wedding cake fantasy in the City, just near the Tower of London. It looks something like if King’s College Chapel mated with a porcupine on top of the Munsters’ house, or the Fortress of Ultimate Darkness out of Time Bandits. While it was drunk.

I have been mostly posting pictures to Flickr lately, so if you are a member of my trusted inner circle of hooded acolytes you should investergate there. If you are a normal person do not.

Too early

I got up extra specially early today so as to be organdised, but obviously I have made a mistake as it is very cold and even animals are looking at me in amazemint as if to say “did your alarm go wrong?”

There is a lovely big crow perched on the lamp post outside my window, trying to warm up in the golden morning light. People do not like crows in general, but that is just because they is black. They are only the same as magpies really which everyone thinks are exciting. If you think about it magpies are just crows with fashion consultants and good PR. They even have their own song!

Free monkey!

Dogg this would basically be the most exciting promotional offer of all time you realise. I saw this in Tescos earlier and I have already been fantasising about what I am going to do with my free monkey. Does anyone know where I can bulk buy some bananas. Romany that is your birthday present sorted!

Tower 42

London’s forgotten skyscraper, Tower 42 (the former NatWest Tower) overtops the nearby Gherkin and every other building in the UK, except the trio of giants at Canary Wharf. It is sort of in the shape of the NatWest logo when seen from above, but unfortunately not being 600 feet tall I cannot confirm this direckly.

Point to the Barbican

The Barbican’s Cromwell Tower reflected in CityPoint. I like the Barbican a lot and would love to live there, it is like a brutalist holiday camp. If you know anyone that has a flat there could you get them to invite me round. I could bring some Twiglets and basic wine.

The distincktive silhouette of Cromwell Tower. The Barbican is an amazing place, a 1960s concrete Corbusian vision of towers in the park, only without the park. The necessary demolition work, as the barbicanliving site sardonically notes, was done by the Luftwaffe in 1940.

I love the blade-like polygonal towers, visible from all over London and the tallest residential buildings in Europe at the time. It is handy if you like classickal concerts as well because there is a special live-in orchestra in the basemint.

Britain’s most inviting café and tapas bar.

How awesome would it be living up there. It is probably a bit inconvenient though when you have to go down 43 floors and back up again just to get a pint of milk. Unless you lowered a basket on a string with some money.

Looking across the City past One Coleman Street to the Gherkin and Tower 42, where we will be going next on this photergraphical mystery tour. Make sure you have got some sandwidges and a refreshing flask of weak lemon drink.